Day 30 - A photo of you when you were happy I laughed when I saw the Day 30 dictate. I loved that whoever wrote it assumes that I was happy before, but not anymore (“when you WERE happy”). Though I have to say, maybe that person was right after all. As I’ve noticed, whatever little joy/passion I have gets depleted as the years go by. In searching for a photo, I only had to go through my albums prior to year 2008, where I could surely find an image of myself when I WAS happy. Because, generally, things got interesting after year 2007. But I wasn’t exactly joyful in this picture taken on November 19, 2007. As a matter of fact, I was both stressed and sleepless here. However, the picture depicts a lot about the time this photo was taken: the red polo shirt, the Sony Ericsson K750i, the name tag, the look on my face. They were all a thing of the past — fragments of a former, peaceful self. I gave a damn; there was a point. I gave a damn because there was a point. In the years since, everything that’s happened could be summed up in this Sarah McLachlan lyric: Funny, how it seems that all I’ve tried to doSeemed to make no difference (to you) at all — The Path of Thorns Okay, I didn’t mean for the last entry in this series to reek of this much negativity. How about this, I’m still trying to find contentment, because I think contentment is THE bedrock of everything else — happiness, passion, fulfillment, etc. Though I think it’s bound to be a lifelong process at the rate I’m going haha! Personally, I think the expression no regrets is a defense mechanism. It’s a way to justify our mistakes and failures as having paved the way for good change, if not a major learning experience. And it’s okay, because we’re only human. We need that reminder that we are the terrific product of having weathered storms and having gone through thunder. That being said, I think I’m more cautious and less idealistic more realistic now, thanks to the last interesting three years. I’ve also learned to set my priorities straight because, the long and short of it is, some things are worth it and some things just aren’t. I guess the way to courting contentment is by finding balance first. * * * This entry a part of the 30 Day Picture Challenge

Day 30 - A photo of you when you were happy

I laughed when I saw the Day 30 dictate. I loved that whoever wrote it assumes that I was happy before, but not anymore (“when you WERE happy”).

Though I have to say, maybe that person was right after all. As I’ve noticed, whatever little joy/passion I have gets depleted as the years go by. In searching for a photo, I only had to go through my albums prior to year 2008, where I could surely find an image of myself when I WAS happy. Because, generally, things got interesting after year 2007.

But I wasn’t exactly joyful in this picture taken on November 19, 2007. As a matter of fact, I was both stressed and sleepless here. However, the picture depicts a lot about the time this photo was taken: the red polo shirt, the Sony Ericsson K750i, the name tag, the look on my face. They were all a thing of the past — fragments of a former, peaceful self.

I gave a damn; there was a point. I gave a damn because there was a point.

In the years since, everything that’s happened could be summed up in this Sarah McLachlan lyric:

Funny, how it seems that all I’ve tried to do
Seemed to make no difference (to you) at all

— The Path of Thorns

Okay, I didn’t mean for the last entry in this series to reek of this much negativity. How about this, I’m still trying to find contentment, because I think contentment is THE bedrock of everything else — happiness, passion, fulfillment, etc. Though I think it’s bound to be a lifelong process at the rate I’m going haha!

Personally, I think the expression no regrets is a defense mechanism. It’s a way to justify our mistakes and failures as having paved the way for good change, if not a major learning experience. And it’s okay, because we’re only human. We need that reminder that we are the terrific product of having weathered storms and having gone through thunder. That being said, I think I’m more cautious and less idealistic more realistic now, thanks to the last interesting three years. I’ve also learned to set my priorities straight because, the long and short of it is, some things are worth it and some things just aren’t. I guess the way to courting contentment is by finding balance first.

* * *

This entry a part of the 30 Day Picture Challenge